Monday, January 26, 2015

Battening down the hatches as a new family of three

Sorry for the absence last Monday, ReaderFriends … If you didn't catch the news on Facebook or the Jaunty Quills blog, Arizona and I were in the process of welcoming Baby H into the world (I'm still working on an online pseudonym, bear with me … What do we think of Wallaby?). And as he turned out to be a big baby, it was a bit of a process. But I've got good drugs, Arizona is doing lots of 'let me get that for you', and over the course of the week, we've gone from happy but shellshocked:




To glimmers of a new normal:




So far, I'm grateful for a whole lot of things--my wonderful hubby; our strapping son who's already sleeping three or four hours at a time (bless him); the happy accident that we're not living in, say, the 1700s, when things probably would've had a very different outcome last Monday … and the fact that Baby H came a little early, which means that a) he didn't get any bigger before attempting to exit stage I-don't-think-you-fit-through-there; and b) we're not staring down the barrel of doing a mad dash to the hospital into the teeth of Winter Storm Juno. 

Yeppers, here on the east coast of the US of A, we're looking at our first big snow event (snowpocalypse?) of the winter. The weather hens are flapping around on the telly, telling us the sky is falling, and those of us who know the routine are doing the usual prepping. Gas for the generator, check. Full charges on all phones and computers, check. Lots of candles and lighters, check. Plenty of food, including canned stuff that will heat easily on the Coleman stove or George Foreman, check. But we've also got the added challenge of a New Baby, and not really being sure what he needs on a day to day basis yet. 

Yesterday, the three of us ventured out to do errands. I managed to pack and forget the awesome tri-fold changing-pad-slash-carry-purse that a dear friend made for me (shout out, Donna!), but we at least remembered the baby and managed to time his feedings so he was a happy, sleepy thing for the duration. (This as opposed to a couple of days earlier when I whipped out an emergency boob in the pediatrician's parking lot, thereby quelling an impending riot.) We got gas, hit the bank, and then pulled into the grocery store, where the parking lot was already packed by midmorning two days before the crap weather was scheduled to hit. Arizona visibly girded his loins and said, 'Do you want to stay in the car with Baby while I do the shopping?'

At least I think that was what he said. I was already out the door and halfway across the parking lot. 

See, he would cheerfully live on a mountaintop and venture into the nearest town only when our supplies ran low. Me? I occasionally need me some noise, lights, rude people, nice people, chai latte and two-for-one sales on English Muffins. So in I plunged to Stop and Shop, which has all of the above, and I started working my way down the daunting list that Arizona and I had put together that morning. In doing so, I completely skipped the baby aisle, not realizing it until I was well past the frozen pizza. 

When you're doing the infertility dance with a side of I-waited-too-long-and-now-am-too-damn-old, you come up with some pretty whacky coping strategies (or was that just me?). I didn't obsess about seeing babies out and about with their moms (too much) or put on my judgy pants when I saw parents doing things different from how I thought I would (mostly). I did, however, avoid going through the baby aisle of whatever store we might be in. I just didn't need to see all the mysterious stuff I might never use, like snot suckers, tiny nail clippers, and fourteen different kinds of wet wipes, each designated for a different body part. Never mind the things that parents speak of with such reverence, like the Diaper Genie and the Boppy.

I still stayed out of those areas once the doctors started saying things like 'you've got a happy baby in there' and 'we'll see you in a week', not wanting to jinx it. So you'd think that my first official venture into Aisle 4 would be a momentous occasion, right? Angels would sing, some appropriately kicky theme song would pour from the overhead speakers, and my fellow shoppers (even the rude ones) would spontaneously burst into applause because Arizona and I had Gotten It Done, Dammit.

In reality, I abandoned my cart next to the beer and waddle-bolted back to the aisle in question, dodging other bodies and carts, and doing a lot of the 'ooh, ouch, eek, ack' that currently accompanies my attempts at perambulation with a whole lot of stitches in tender places. Down Aisle 4 I went, past the wipey things, washy things, sucky things, and liquid food things that I haven't yet felt myself lacking, down to the diapers. 

Where I froze, confronted by entirely Too Many Choices. 

And then I, who routinely ignores the suggestions from Amazon and Netflix as to what I might like based on my past purchases, preferring instead to do my own research and form my own opinions, grabbed a familiar bag like it was a lifeline in the midst of Winter Storm Juno, going with the same brand and size (not newborn, see above re: big baby) that the hospital had provided. And, sweating like I had thrown on a heavy parka and twenty extra pounds and gone for an awkward jog (because, well, that's pretty accurate), I returned to my cart, panicked briefly when I didn't see it next to the pizza, located it next to the beer, and continued onward, triumphantly in possession of a storm's worth of Pampers. 

I hope.



35 comments:

  1. So many congratulations again, Jesse, to you, Arizona, and (maybe) Wallaby. This post started my morning off with a huge smile! Stay warm and safe!!

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    1. Thank you, Vanessa! Zee snow has already begun. We shall see what the finally tally reaches, and will be making the appropriate sacrifices to the gods of power and internet ;) Happy Monday!

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  2. I'm so glad you have a generator. I was worried about you guys this morning when I heard your area is going to get hit hard.

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    1. Aw, thank you, Lissa! That's very kind of you to think of us! Fortunately my-hubby-the-semi-prepper not only has us set up with a generator and good snowblower, we've got winter-type camping gear, wood split for emergency fires, and MREs for use in a pinch. And, well, the Panera down the street usually has power--LOL!

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  3. You are awesome!!!!!!

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  4. I thought this morning: So Very Glad Wallaby arrived well ahead of the Snowpocalypse. Ze Bebbe Aisle is a new frontier with many mysteries and choices. You're going to be an awesome mom. Besides, you're a horse trainer. You can handle a baby/toddler/"foal"-you-tote-around. :) ;)

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    1. LOL, Rhonda! Just today hubby complimented my fledgling mom skills, and I countered with, 'well, it helps to have spent several decades keeping large suicidal animals alive--you just think of the five worst things that could happen, try to avoid them, and then have fun with the rest' :)

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    2. ::Snork!:: "Large suicidal animals." Yup. That pretty much sums 'em up. They'll crash into anything to get away from the scary shadow from the wren flying over. :)

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  5. Beautiful son! So happy for you, and very glad this first week doesn't seem to have sapped you of your wit and good humor. Best wishes for continued baby bliss! Stay safe and warm these next few days.

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    1. Thank you, Jamie (and knuckle tap to a fellow member of the Big Baby club)! You stay safe and warm, too, and thanks for the good wishes :)

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  6. Congratulations, on baby. I can completely relate to the 1700's comment. Don't over do it! I keep thinking about your blog with the gentle dinosaurs and predator fish decals, and how happy that room will be to have a little/big boy.

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    1. Aw, you're sweet, Gayle. And thanks for the reminder--Arizona has discovered that it doesn't work to tell me not to do stuff, but that I'm okay being told to only do half of it ;)

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  7. Can't tell you how happy I am for you and Arizona! Major congrats on Wallaby. Lots of love and hugs from across the Pond - until I can give them to you in person! xx

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    1. Squee! Anna! Thanks so much for the shout out, and will look forward to those in-person hugs!

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  8. I love to read your blogs! I always smile, and shake my head (because I completely get it) and sometimes I laugh out loud. I am well past the baby aisle stage of my life but I can remember the emergency boob, and forgetting the diaper bag and being incredibly impressed I remembered the baby! Congrats and enjoy Wallaby. He is a doll.

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    1. You're making me feel so much better already! Thanks for the shout out, and for hanging out here with me :)

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  9. I can't tell you how happy I am for you guys! And we'll give a pass for last week. I think you were SLIGHTLY busy. ;) *hugs*
    Oh... and try to to pull your stitches. Just the thought of that makes my butt tingle.

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    1. Right? (I'm assuming you meant 'NOT to pull your stitches', unless you and your butt are feeling particularly evil today- bwa ha ha ha!) So far, so good, but I did have a funny condo with hubby the other day about how much I was craving a donut. He thought we were talking about chocolate frosted; I was talking about the inflatable butt pillow kind … It got weird.

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    2. And by 'funny condo' I meant 'funny convo'. Thanks Autocorrect.

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  10. You and Baby H are absolutely gorgeous. Thank you for sharing the pics. I am so excited for you and Arizona and I am so so so happy that we're not in the 1700s...We're getting hit by the storm too. Stay safe and warm! xoxo

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    1. Hugs to you and your mom, and thanks so much for the kind words! The 1700's comment was Arizona's, but I'll confess that I did a nod-nod. Then I pointed out that the nutritional standards of the 1700's probably didn't lend themselves to Giant MegaBabies. Because I'm like that (wink).

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  11. Congrats Jess! 9 lbs! OUCH! I was "lucky" to have two nine-pounders via c-section because, according to the doctor, I was "skinny on the inside." Enjoy every moment because you blink and your kid is in college in NYC. Yes, that happened to me! And the good news is you'll figure it all out. We all do! Congrats again!

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    1. Hi Marie! Thanks so much for the shout out! Yeah, ouch is right, though the end result was achieved and the rest will heal. They probably would have C-sectioned me had they realized how big he was (and that he was facing up, not down), but the last sonogram downgraded him from 'Giant Monster Baby' to 'Normal Size Baby', so they thought we were in the clear. Whoops!

      Gosh, college already!?? Hard to believe--I remember hanging with you and kiddo whilst texting Arizona when we first connected on Match but hadn't met yet. Good times! But you made a really cool kiddo, Mom. Wishing all many adventures :)

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  12. Such an enjoyable, witty trip down memory lane - and the baby aisle - with you Jess! Big smile as I think of all the "firsts" ahead for you and Arizona. I can't wait to meet my newest "niece" and Grand-nephew in person. "Auntie" Jennifer ... sounds so old, but I don't feel like it!

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    1. *waves to Auntie Jennifer* Glad you enjoyed, and stay tuned for the further adventures of Jess, Arizona and Wallaby :) And yes, we'll definitely have to do some traveling and meet in person. Looking forward to it!

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  13. Congrats on the new big baby! Your story was hilarious. Wishing you the best in the storm.

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    1. Thanks, Squenn! So far so good--we've got a few inches on the ground, the car is tucked in the garage (aka Arizona's mountain bike shop), and my boys are snoring away. Life could be far worse :)

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  14. So excited for your family!!! Baby H is a big boy but super cute! Mega congrats to you and Arizona! FYI, it won't be the last time you have to whip out an emergency boob in a parking lot. ;)

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    1. Hey Liza! *waves* LOLOL--yes, I suspect the emergency boob is going to be a godsend. Fortunately, it'll be difficult to leave the house without two of them!

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  15. OMG!! I am so happy for you. I only hope my husband and I have the same success at our (not going to mention a number) age as well!
    Good luck with the storm. I hope it's not to bad.
    And of course....HE IS SUCH A CUTIE PIE!! :)

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    1. Thank you, Carla! Sending you all my good vibes that it happens for you guys, in whatever form it's meant to be! So far we've gotten off relatively easy on the snow front--there's probably a couple of feet on the ground, but it didn't stick in the trees and take too many down, so we've still got power and 'net. (Knock on wood.)

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  16. As the owner of a 9lb 6oz Monster Baby I can only say well done! Enjoy every moment because the years go so quick. Mine is now 13 and started high school yesterday (we are in New Zealand so start of the new school year) but it only seems like yesterday he was doing 45 minute powernaps during the day! All the very best to you, Arizona and Baby H.

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  17. Congrats and how exciting! Nothing better than being a mom! I've got 3 daughters...almost 22, 20 and 18! Live is crazy, loud, lots of drama and filled with so much love I wouldn't trade it for anything! Enjoy...those first years go by so fast!

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